Work Place Advice: 5 Tips Of Dealing With Backstabbing Colleagues

You’re working hard, minding your business, then boom! You hear through the grapevine that a colleague you trusted has been bad-mouthing you to the boss. Si rahisi, this office politics is real in our Kenyan workplaces.

Don’t worry, this article gives you five practical tips, straight from our local context, to handle those backstabbing colleagues and protect your peace and your career. .

Document Everything and Keep Your Cool

The first rule when you suspect a colleague is undermining you is to stay calm and start collecting evidence. Reacting emotionally in the office or on WhatsApp groups can make you look unprofessional. Instead, quietly note down dates, times, and specifics of what was said or done.

Create a Private Work Journal

Don’t use the company’s shared drive or email for this. Get a simple notebook from a local supermarket like Naivas or Quickmart for around KES 150, or use a secure notes app on your personal phone. Write down every suspicious interaction factually. This record is crucial if you ever need to present your case to HR or your manager.

Master the Art of the Polite Follow-Up Email

If a colleague makes a promise in a meeting and then changes the story, protect yourself. Send a brief, polite email saying, “As per our discussion, just confirming that you will handle the client report by Friday. Thanks!” This creates a paper trail and makes it harder for them to twist the narrative later without exposing themselves.

Strengthen Your Alliances and Understand the Office Map

Backstabbers often target those who seem isolated. Your best defence is to build genuine, professional relationships with other colleagues. This isn’t about gossip, but about being a reliable team player so that your good reputation speaks for itself.

  • Find a Mentor: Look for a respected senior colleague, maybe from your tribe or not, who understands the company culture. Buy them a coffee at Java or Artcaffe (budget KES 500-700) and seek advice on navigating office dynamics. Their insight is gold.
  • Know the Informal Networks: In many Kenyan offices, real influence isn’t always on the org chart. Notice who the boss trusts for chai breaks or who organizes the weekend football match. Being cordial with these informal leaders can provide a buffer against false stories.
  • The Kenyan Insight: Use communal events to your advantage. Actively participate in the Harambee for a colleague, contribute to the office tea fund, or join the lunch table. Being seen as a supportive, watu-wa-ku person makes others less likely to believe negative tales about you.

Cost and Availability in Kenya

Dealing with workplace politics doesn’t have to be expensive. The main costs are for personal tools and optional professional support. Most core strategies, like documentation and relationship-building, are free but require your time and emotional energy.

OptionCost (KES)Where to Get It
Basic Notebook for Journaling100 – 250Bookstores like Text Book Centre, supermarkets (Naivas, Carrefour), or stationery shops in any town.
Informal Mentor Meeting (Coffee)500 – 1,000Nairobi cafes (Java, Artcaffe) cost more. In towns like Nakuru or Kisumu, a similar meeting at a local hotel can be KES 300-600.
Professional Counselling Session2,000 – 6,000+Available online via platforms like Wazi Counselling or in-person at clinics in major cities. Some companies offer Employee Assistance Programmes (EAP) for free.
Networking Event Fee0 – 3,000Many professional forums on LinkedIn or Eventbrite are free. Paid workshops by institutes like ICPAK or Strathmore Business School are pricier.

Online resources like articles and podcasts are widely available for free. The key investment is your consistent effort to apply the advice.

Mistakes to Avoid

Confronting Them Publicly or on Office WhatsApp

Calling someone out during a meeting or in the work WhatsApp group creates drama and makes you look unstable. The correct approach is to address serious issues privately or through formal HR channels with your documented evidence.

Retaliating with Your Own Gossip

Starting a counter-campaign to tarnish their reputation lowers you to their level and validates their narrative about you. Stay above the fray. Focus on excelling in your work so your output speaks louder than their whispers.

Assuming HR is Automatically Your Ally

In some Kenyan companies, HR may prioritize peace over justice, especially if the other person is well-connected. Don’t just run to HR with emotions. Go with clear facts, dates, and a calm request for guidance, not just a demand for punishment.

Withdrawing Completely from Team Activities

Because one person has betrayed you, don’t boycott the office tea break, team building in Naivasha, or Friday meetings. This isolation makes you an easier target. Be professionally present and engage with the wider team.

The Bottom Line

Dealing with a backstabbing colleague is tough, but it’s a test of your professional maturity. The goal isn’t to “win” a fight, but to protect your reputation, your mental peace, and your career trajectory. By documenting facts, building strong alliances, and avoiding emotional reactions, you take back control.

Start today by quietly noting any concerning interactions and making a genuine effort to connect with a trusted colleague over chai. Your consistent, professional conduct will always be your strongest shield.

Frequently Asked Questions: Work Place Advice: 5 Tips of Dealing with Backstabbing Colleagues in Kenya

Should I report the colleague to my boss immediately?

Not immediately. First, gather solid evidence in your private journal. Going to your boss or HR with just suspicions can backfire and make you seem like you’re causing trouble.

Wait until you have a clear pattern of behaviour or a specific incident that affected work. Present the facts calmly, not emotionally.

What if the backstabber is my boss or a very senior person?

This is very delicate. Your focus must shift to building a strong, visible record of your excellent work and finding allies at their level or in HR.

Document everything meticulously. In extreme cases, you may need to consult a labour lawyer or start discreetly looking for a new job.

Is it worth paying for professional counselling because of office politics?

Yes, if the stress is affecting your health and work. Seeing a counsellor for a few sessions (KES 2,000-6,000 per session) is an investment in your mental well-being.

Check if your company has a free Employee Assistance Programme (EAP). Online platforms like Wazi Counselling offer privacy and flexibility.

How do I build alliances without seeming like I’m also gossiping?

Focus on work-related collaboration. Offer genuine help on projects, be reliable, and engage in positive talk about work goals, not other people.

Participate in legitimate team activities like lunch or harambees. Build relationships based on professional respect, not shared complaints.

What’s a local, low-cost way to de-stress from this situation?

Engage in affordable physical activity. Go for a walk in a public park, join a weekly social sports team, or hit the gym. Physical exercise is a great stress reliever.

Talk to trusted friends or family outside your workplace. Sometimes, just venting in a safe space can provide huge relief and perspective.

Author

  • Ravasco Kalenje is the visionary founder and CEO of Jua Kenya, a comprehensive online resource dedicated to providing accurate and up-to-date information about Kenya. With a rich background in linguistics, media, and technology, Ravasco brings a unique blend of skills and experiences to his role as a digital content creator and entrepreneur. See More on Our Contributors Page

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